A Co Armagh man, who fears his gambling addiction will eventually kill him, says there is not enough support available for people like him – and it’s a problem, he says, that is a “ticking time bomb”.
Hugh – not his real name – lives in the Lurgan area and says his addiction has seen him go from £1 bets as a 12/13-year-old to £500 and £1,000 bets.
Hugh recently lost his fiancée to his obsessive gambling and now fears it’s only a matter of time before he loses his home.
Two loans in the space of one week – £2,200 and £2,900 – have been wiped out, lost to the bookmakers.
The pressure mounting on his shoulders is becoming a cross he feels he can no longer carry.
But there was a period when he felt he could manage his addiction.
“There was a Gamblers Anonymous meeting in Lurgan Town Hall every Wednesday evening,” he explained.
“I was flying. I wasn’t gambling for over nine months because I was talking to people who were going through what I was going through.”
It was the best kind of therapy for Hugh, but when COVID hit, the classes in Lurgan stopped. Now, the closest weekly class is either in Dungannon or Newry.
But Hugh questioned: “What about those who don’t drive, or have access to a car, or the time to make the journey? Surely this needs to be looked at?”
The anger he holds for himself is palpable; he wrongly describes himself as “pathetic”. He admits to having a problem, but getting help is not as straightforward for him as perhaps it should be.
“I’m just angry. I know it’s all my fault, but like, why is it there’s not more being done? Or why is this not being talked about more? Where are the controls? I blame myself 99%, but that other 1%, you want to find someone to blame. Why is there no more help out there?”
When Hugh speaks of controls, he uses GAMSTOP – an online tool that restricts you from placing bets – but that doesn’t stop him from walking into any bookmakers locally and placing a bet. It’s the same, he says, for Facebook competitions.
“It doesn’t stop me spending hundreds, even thousands, with these competitions all over Facebook; that’s just wrong,” he said.
“When I go into the bookies locally, they know I have an addiction; they’re watching me sit there for five, six hours a day, losing £600, £2,000, leaving there in tears, and the next day, you’re back in. Nobody says a word. You see all these adverts to say ‘take care, gamble responsibly,’ but no one gives a s**t – no one!”
It’s not true, though. There are people out there who do care, but as Hugh says, “it’s a hidden problem”.
“It’s really blowing up now with young people. At least with drugs and drink, you can see the effects they have on you. But I know, speaking from my experience, it has killed me. I’ve almost taken my life multiple times.
“My own mum would phone me every day and be like, ‘come on, just one day at a time,’ and I would lie to her and tell her I’m doing well.
“All my friends know about me, it’s not a secret, but I don’t think they know the extent of it either.
“I lost my fiancée just before Christmas due to gambling. I bought my own home, I don’t know how, it’s a miracle, so I’m currently really, really scared of falling behind on my mortgage. If I continue to get these loans and mess about, it’s just a matter of time really. That will be hard to get over.”
It’s almost like the writing is on the wall for Hugh, which is probably what prompted him to reach out and make a public call for more to be done.
While there is help, it’s perhaps a few too many hoops for some people.
“I got referred to the Dunlewey Addictions Services after going to see my GP. I told the doctor everything and how this is going to kill me, which is when I got referred to a counsellor, and she referred me to Dunlewey.
“But you need to be very lucky. I waited three months to get into that, and they did 12 one-hour sessions. After that, you’re on your own again.”
Hugh finished his sessions about six months ago.
“The day after, I was just gambling again. It just sounds so simple, don’t gamble! But I know, after speaking with you, I’ll be itching, itching to go and gamble.
“Even when I went to see the woman in Dunlewey, you’re just telling her what she wants to hear, whereas the only thing I find helped was the actual classes. See sitting around the table with 25 other people in Lurgan and hearing firsthand, especially from older people, how they lost their house, lost their wife, lost their business, that’s the only thing that really helps, speaking to people who have been through it, or going through it with you.”
Hugh tries to keep himself busy, easier done in summer, but the long winter nights make it much, much tougher. And when he’s off work, like he is at the moment, it becomes a 10-fold issue.
“Yesterday, I made this plan myself,” he explained. “I wrote in my notes before I went to bed how gambling makes me feel. Everything about how s**t it makes me feel.”
Before that, Hugh detailed his day.
“I took the dog to Lurgan Park, went for a mad long walk, came home, went to play golf, did everything, just trying to keep busy, and then whenever it got dark, I just found myself sitting in the bookies, and you’re like, ‘what am I doing?’
“I actually broke even but I was down about £680 in the space of half an hour and then I finally was able to claw it back; I got very lucky and I left. I wasn’t meant to be in the bookies, but then you’re in a pure trance thinking, ‘how do I even end up here?’
“It doesn’t matter if it’s a £50 or £500 bet, it’s hard to explain. You’re just itching to place a bet and winning or losing doesn’t really matter. It’s pathetic, but you can’t shake that feeling.”
Asked why he doesn’t go around and tell the bookmakers to stop him from betting, Hugh says: “You would have to go around every individual bookmaker and get passport photos and fill out these forms. I don’t know, it’s kind of embarrassing, whereas if you go online, you have to just click a form. Having to go into the place and speak face to face and all the staff looking at you. It’s a shame thing, I think.”
Times have changed for the high school boy getting older people to place his £1 bets, but it doesn’t have to be the way it is for him and many others like Hugh.
“Just one hour a week,” Hugh asks. “Why can’t they bring the class back for one hour? How much effort, or money, would it cost to get classes up and running again?
“It’s the silence. If I had somewhere to go and talk to those people. Being left alone is just s**t.”
The lights may go out at night, and the silence fills the air, but inside Hugh’s head, the sounds of the bookies – the ring of the slot, the release of the traps – whirl around in his head. Some day, those sounds and those lights may go out for good.
If you would like to reach out to Hugh, get in touch with us at editor@armaghi.com and we can pass your details on at his request.
In response, a Southern Trust spokesperson said: “Support to people with a gambling problem is delivered by the Public Health Agency commissioned service, Dunlewey Addiction Services. It is available to people within the Southern Trust area, including Armagh, Portadown, Craigavon and Lurgan areas.
“More information and contact details can be found on their website: Problem Gambling Service – Dunlewey Addiction Services
“Dunlewey Addiction Services and the Gambling Anonymous meeting in Lurgan are not Trust commissioned services, so The Trust is unable to provide further details on these organisations.”
If you wish to reach out to Hugh – at his request – get in contact with us at Armagh I and we can pass along your details.
