An elderly Armagh widower, who lost £7,500 from a pot he had saved towards a knee-replacement in an elaborate romance scam, has spoken of the emotional turmoil he has suffered .
The 70-year-old pensioner entered Armagh I‘s office on Thursday (July 2) clearly still distressed by what had happened some months prior.
Pulling envelopes of evidence from a carrier bag, he explained that after his wife’s death, five years ago, he began badly needing companionship.
He recounted the story of how he came to be “fooled and taken for a mug” online.
As it has still not been determined if any of the people involved are using their real names or aliases they have been changed throughout this article for legal reasons.
The man explained that in February 2026, he met a “lady friend” online, called ‘Gail’.
They began talking regularly. He believed her to be living in England. Later, Gail introduced him to her aunt, called ‘Gwen’.
In the weeks that followed Gwen then sent him a message to say that Gail had taken her own life. The shock message was followed by a photo of a headstone and funeral notice.
Armagh I searched the real name associated with Gail and did find an online obituary, however, the woman we found, living in the same area in England, appeared to have passed away in 2021.
Gwen continued communicating with the man in Gail’s absence and promised to visit him in Armagh in April of this year.
She made promises to him that they would “get married” and – despite his age – “have a family”.
She also, however, indicated she was in desperate need of £5,000 for a house deposit.
He admits now that he was “vulnerable” but at that time, he sincerely believed he was helping a genuine person, one whom he believed to have had real feelings for him.
And, while not particularly wealthy, he did have the means to do it. He had been saving for years into an account towards a costly knee-replacement surgery.
The badly-needed operation was expected to cost £15,000. While he still needed the surgery, he felt he could safely make a loan to his “friend”.
The money was sent to a Starling bank account in the name of Gwen’s supposed sister-in-law, “Princess”.
By March, the unassuming, lonely man said he had been “swindled” out of a total of £7,500 made in two separate payments to Princess.
Pressure was also being put on him to send an additional £10,000 towards a house.
The notion that this may all be much more sinister than he believed it to be came to light when diligent members of his savings branch identified that he may have fallen prey to a scam and intervened.
Police were notified and a report was filed for suspected fraud.
Since he began communicating with these women – who he has now reason to believe may actually be one man – he says he never met any in person and spoke once with a person with a “women’s voice” on the phone.
All other correspondence took place via message.
The sad reality of the scam is not the loss of the money. While he does need it, he says, financially he will “be ok”.
The real impact has been the toil it has taken on his mental health and emotional wellbeing. He described a lack of sleep, thoughts of taking his own life and describes the world we live in as a “terrible, horrible and sad”.
He remains unsure as to whether the money he has lost is recoverable or whether police will ever identify the perpetrator behind the scam.
When asked if he was put off trying to meet someone again in the future, he simply looked at the ground and shook his head.
The case with Report Fraud remains ongoing and he is carefully filing and collecting all evidence and correspondence in relation to his complaint.
Thankfully, he has the support of close family and good friends who he said are giving him “sound advice”.
The PSNI website provides the following advice in relation to romance scams: “Romance scams are commonplace and the fraudsters behind them will stop at nothing to target you in your search for companionship.
“Fraudsters will seek to build a relationship quickly and try to get you to chat or text away from the dating site or app you first met them on. This allows them to keep in contact if their profile is deleted for being fake.
“They appear very interested in you, very quickly, but will have lots of excuses for not being able to meet in person, a family emergency or a work problem that’s just come up.
“Soon they will ask you for money to help them sort out their problems or to help them come meet you, perhaps to pay for travel, all the while assuring you it will be paid back to you. You will continually be reassured it’s just this one thing, just this amount and then they’ll be able to come meet you.
“However, they have no intention of doing so because they do not exist. All they wanted was your money and to get as much of it as possible.”
How to protect yourself from romance scams
– Stay on the app – Always keep communication on the dating website or app you’re using. Many have inbuilt security and assistance. They also take steps to remove and ban fake accounts so you’re safer there.
– Check their socials – Carry out your own research on the person, checking their social media presence to see if it matches what’s on the dating site. Looking at key details such as name, location and family members can help identify inconsistencies in what you have been told.
– Check their photo – Profile pictures can be deceiving and be taken from anywhere on the internet. You can use various websites to check photos using a reverse image search to prove if the photo is valid.
– Never ever send money to someone you haven’t met in person – If you’re looking for friendship, companionship or love online it should never start with being asked for money, and if it does it’s not a friends or relationship worth having.
“Romance scammers don’t care about your gender, sexuality, age or race,” they add. “They target everyone, please don’t let it be you. Always remember to stay on site, using reputable dating ones. Never send money to someone you have not met or receive/transfer money on their behalf. Be alert, keep yourself safe.”
